Are you watching porn and checking out members of the same sex, to make sure you are not gay? You could have intrusive thoughts about being gay. HOCD stands for Homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and is a term that is used to describe having unwanted intrusive thoughts in relation to your sexual preference.
This page is suitable for men Toc homosexual relationships women. Aims of this page If you are suddenly questioning your sexual preference, this page is to help you understand what is happening to you. Unwanted thoughts are not thoughts you are choosing to have.
This is important for you to understand at the outset. If I were a lot younger and just at the beginning of romantic relationships and discovered that I was more attracted to other girls, I might choose to think about my sexuality, about having relationships with other women and then decide to live my life accordingly. This is in stark contrast to the Toc homosexual relationships scenario.
If now I get a thought in my head that my sexual preference has changed, this could be an example of an intrusive thought as my sexual preference has not changed; I am still heterosexual but my thoughts are telling me something different. They are all examples of intrusive thoughts. My aim for this page is to help you to see that having unwanted thoughts about your sexual preference, thoughts, that at the moment you have no control over, may be a symptom for Toc homosexual relationships of a better word or OCD or intrusive thoughts.
HOCD stands for Homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and it is characterised by having unwanted thoughts about your sexual orientation. It can take the from of purely an obsessive thought intrusive thoughtwhich can include thoughts and urges relating to your sexual preference, but there are usually hidden compulsions — compulsions are things you do to make
Toc homosexual relationships feel better, to reassure yourself you are not Toc homosexual relationships.
This could be watching porn to make sure you are straight, or looking at guys to see if you are attracted to them. People with HOCD constantly question their sexual preference and are troubled by thoughts that they might be gay.
Before developing HOCD, you would not have given any thought to your sexual preference as it would have been a given. An important point to note is that it is not the content of the thoughts that are the problem, i.
These are all characteristics of OCD and can be treated. If you have been heterosexual all your life, you will still be heterosexual, it just feels like you might "Toc homosexual relationships" gay and not know it. Toc homosexual relationships the video below to see if you recognise yourself in any of it. Thousands of random thoughts pop into your head every day. Most of which you will not pay any attention to.
However, a red flag will raise if you think you might be gay. This should in fact help you, as my plan is to get you to see it more in terms of something that is happening to you at the moment, as opposed to your sexual orientation changing. In other words, if you are heterosexual straightyou may now be concerned that you are gay.
Worried that Toc homosexual relationships that may have occurred in your past or in your childhood, are some sort of proof that you are now gay.
Noticing something nice about members of the same sex, may make you see this as evidence that you are gay. Worried if you cannot get an erection, or sexually aroused if you are female, that this could that you are gay When you get these obsessions, i.
The things you do are known as compulsions. Even if you are convinced or have been told that you have Pure O just the thoughts or obsessionsread on, as most people have compulsions, but they do not recognise them as compulsions.
This is how to start thinking about your HOCD. Going over in your mind, previous sexual encounters with members of the opposite sex, to reassure yourself that you are not Toc homosexual relationships. On the other hand, you might try to imagine being with a member of the same sex, to check out your theory that you might be gay. You might have remembered an event from Toc homosexual relationships childhood that you now see as evidence that you are gay. Asking current or previous partners questions to help you to decide about your sexuality.
You might avoid going out or mixing with same sex couple, or showing support in any way for same sex couples. If you are like most people, you will not question the thoughts in your head you will question all the HOCD thoughtsbut will not question the validity of your own beliefs.
You can think of a belief system as being a set of rules you have to make sense of our world and your experiences, but many of them will not be correct or not helpful to you as a person. For example, if you grew up thinking you had to please others in order to be liked; this is quite hard to maintain as an adult, and does not allow for the fact that people will like you regardless of whether or not you are doing things to please them!
If you notice that you find members of your own sex attractive, there are more things than faulty beliefs at play here. You are also more likely to, what I call, "Toc homosexual relationships," this feeling of attraction.
If you hold a faulty belief see above that finding members of your own sex attractive, means that you must be gay, you are a victim of your belief system, as opposed to being gay.
Toc homosexual relationships beings find many things attractive.
Houses, cars, people, gardens,
Toc homosexual relationships the list goes on. This does not mean that you want a physical and romantic relationship with them, but if you have a faulty belief system, it will certainly cause you difficulties. This is also a faulty belief system as if you get a HOCD related thought, your belief system will guide you to think that it must mean that you are gay.
Random thoughts mean nothing. I can think I am 21 years old and multi millionaire and sadly, it is not true, as thoughts mean nothing. I shall contradict myself now; thoughts only have the meaning that you give to them, so be careful about any faulty beliefs you may hold.
You might have noticed that in your life before HOCD, you never questioned your sexual preference, took heterosexual relationships for granted, and never really noticed who was gay and who was straight. Now you have a radar, or a spotlight as I like to think of it, where everything you do, and everywhere you go, you seem to notice things that Toc homosexual relationships you question your sexual preference.
This can be explained by a term call selective attention. There are too many things, at any given time in life, to focus on, so we have the ability to filter out the noise and focus on what is important. Think about Toc homosexual relationships your car, you filter out the background noise, the scenery and pay attention to the Toc homosexual relationships and the signs that you need to read.
In your life before HOCD, you would have filtered out all the things that are causing you distress Toc homosexual relationships. If you were meeting friends for a coffee, you would have filtered out the people you walked past, how you were walking, and focused on getting to the coffee shop and filtered out the background noise to enjoy your friends company.
Now you have a spotlight, you can selectively attend to everything you associate with being gay.